the list of now

The first thing that struck me about this compact, yet ambitious solo performance show was how nicely it teeters on the edge between camp and sincerity. Writer and performer Leigh Hendrix moves between characters effortlessly. An intense motivational speaker, an awkwardly wavering performance artist and an earnest young lesbian, coming to terms with coming out – all characters who demand, one way or another, for an audience to take them seriously.

Now, I have seen a lot of shows completely crumble under that kind of premise, because it’s incredibly hard to walk that line between over-the-top and some kind of statement about something as complicated as sexual identity without ultimately taking yourself too seriously. I’ve seen productions with great potential wilt under the weight of attempting to be clever.

Not this one. This one just really works. And it’s genuinely funny.

I think what makes is so enjoyable is a kind of straightforwardness and clarity, brought by a solid script that never gets too heavy, but manages to be relatable and compelling anyway. Great direction (Peter Deffet) also goes a long way by adding a bit of a wink and a nod to the humor already in the script. The audience is invited in on the joke and led by the blocking, in the way her characters address and approach the audience and her physicality.

The Artists’ Exchange is a great venue for this – cozy little black box, but with excellent seating. It is intimate without being uncomfortable. Leigh Hendrix uses the space really well. Her movement keeps the pace of the show quite nicely. And I think this was one of the only times in recent history when I didn’t absolutely cringe when a performer came into the audience.

When the show ends, you’ve laughed a lot, but hopefully also noticed more than a few questions that are neatly tucked into the performance. The imprint of them lingers on you when you leave. If you identify as a queer woman, you might find yourself benchmarking your own experiences and identity markers against her lesbian characters and playful stereotypes and finding a lot of familiarity there. If you aren’t, I imagine this show will certainly have you contemplating your perceptions of what queer female sexuality looks and acts like.

(In case you are wondering, that list at the end? The one with everything you need to know in order to be a lesbian? Completely true.)

How To Be a Lesbian in 10 Days or Less will be at the Artists’ Exchange in Cranston, RI again this weekend from September 29th – October 1st.  For ticket information or to learn about upcoming performances in Myrtle Beach SC, NYC and beyond – check out the “Performances” page on the show’s website.

If you want to know more about Leigh Hendrix, you can check out her website and read my recent interview Seven Questions With Theatre Artist and Professional Lesbian, Leigh Hendrix.

Recently a good friend came up to Rhode Island for a weekend visit. Newport was on the short list of places that she needed to see, especially in the Summer. We went out on one of those harbor cruises that are thought of as being just for tourists. I see no reason to have attitude as a local. When it comes to experiencing whatever I can in any given place, I don’t discriminate.

I grew up in Rhode Island, but didn’t spend a lot of time in Newport. I don’t know if my parents didn’t want to deal with the traffic, the bridge, the tourists or they thought of it just as a place reserved for the wealthy and well-connected? Many Rhode Islanders seem to feel that way.

Well here’s a secret, Newport is a very beautiful place with deep history and fun mash-up of something for everyone. It’s much more accessible than people seem to think.  I’ve only been living nearby for a few months now, so I’m still exploring and discovering many new great places to go and things to do there.

In June, the New York Times Travel Section did a 36 Hours in Newport piece and I’ve done almost nothing on their list! So now I have some new ideas to look forward to.

Here are a few places in Newport that I have visited and would recommend:

Empire Tea and Coffee – This place has plenty of seating, wifi, and is unpretentious and inviting.  Their coffee is great, but their tea menu is astounding! I highly recommend their Cinnamon Rooibos.

The Cliff Walk - A 3.5 mile walk along the cliffs  overlooking the ocean. It’s free. Most of it is a comfortable path to follow, there is only a small part that is more challenging hike. Last time we went on a really hot day, I’m looking forward to going back on a somewhat chilly (and uncrowded) Fall afternoon.

Sachuest Beach (Second Beach) -   My favorite of the Newport/Middletown Beaches.  Let the Beach party rage on for the young, tan, and sparsely-clothed over at First Beach. I like peaceful, expansive beaches that feel more natural and private. This one is great.

The Fastnet Pub – A cozy neighborhood Irish Pub with a good menu of comfort staples and good prices.

Diego’s – We stopped here for lunch on crowded Bowen’s Wharf. It was solidly good, fresh Mexican food. I had Watermelon Gazpacho that inspired me to make my gazpacho and add in watermelon to experiment at home. I will be back, especially in the Fall when it’s a bit quieter in the busy Newport waterfront area.

And seriously, tourist or local, get yourself on a boat and out on the Harbor. You won’t regret it.

If anyone has any suggestions for me to try in Newport (or nearby) leave them in the comments!

In the post I wrote yesterday, I discussed recent comments Gordon had made regarding the Tiverton High School GSA and also mentioned how other officials and the school’s superintendent had publicly voiced their disapproval of his remarks and support for the group.  The growing chorus of responses to his comments is a very good thing and several people had called out how inappropriate and misguided his attitude was.

I wanted to point out one response in particular that was excellent. Today, in a Letter to the Editor on the Patch website ,where Gordon’s initial inflammatory comment appeared, an alumni of Tiverton High, Sarah Jey Whitehead went a step further.  In her letter she completely spells out why his statements and disapproval aren’t just out of line, but actual homophobic harassment and bullying in that they single out students who identify as LBTQ and their supporters in an attempt to silence their visible identities in school.   She explains to him the difference between sex and sexuality, and the identity politics that go along with that.  My favorite part is where she very clearly and eloquently breaks down the heteronormative culture of the average high school:

High school itself could essentially be conceived of as one big Straight Club that everyone is, by default, expected to join. From what I have heard, the Tiverton GSA is responding constructively and respectfully to that dynamic, by initiating a dialogue that acknowledges sexualities that are often overlooked or condemned.

We are talking about protecting and supporting young people’s senses of self here- and in equating this agenda with delinquency, lewdness, and cruelty, I hope you understand that you are bullying too.

And, on that note, an Anti-Bullying Alliance sounds like a great idea for another new organization- but changing the current title of the GSA would not only deny their right to name the social issue immediately at hand for them, but it in effect would imply that there is something wrong with discussing that issue. Seeing that the Straight Club that is High School culture can persist as it has without debate around the issue of sexuality, it would appear that sexuality is not the issue here, but gay people, and those who choose to ally with them.

Word, Sarah Jey Whitehead.  Perfectly put.

It is important that this appeared on the local Patch website, not only as a direct rebuttal to Gordon’s latest hi-jinks, but as a primer for the entire town and community.  Although I was happy to see how many comments support the GSA, the town also has several vocal comment-trolls that don’t see any problem privileging their opinions and religious beliefs about gay people over the safety of students and their right to not be bullied or told to lie and stay silent.  And her letter is the first that doesn’t just say “Shame on you” to Gordon, but distinctly spells out the reasons why his attitude is fucked up and calls him out for the true plain homophobia at the root of his supposed concern to taxpayer dollars.  Please go read the entire letter because it’s excellent.

And Ms. Whitehead if you read this, thank you for bringing the verbal smackdown to a debate that really needed your voice. Well done.

Tomorrow is the Day of Silence.  It is an annual day of action started by GLSEN in which students and teachers at schools across the country plan protests, events and take a day-long vow of silence to represent the bullying and silencing of LGBTQ youth.

Obviously the necessity of a day like this personally resonates with me, as someone who stayed closeted and afraid all through highschool. With the recent suicides of several gay youth, all stemming from situations of bullying and harassment, it would seem like any reasonable human being could understand this issue.  Right?

I mean, it would take quite a bigoted, ignorant asshat to go out of their way to condemn or pick on a group of people working towards acceptance and safer schools for all students, wouldn’t it?

Well here he is, meet Rhode Island State Rep. Dan Gordon.

Here’s the short version of what happened.  A senior at Tiverton High School started the school’s very first Gay-Straight Alliance.  The local Patch website ran a great little story about her and the new group. I read it and was really proud and excited for the students.  I thought about how grateful I would have been to have that when I was in high school.  I thought about what a difference this would probably make in the lives of youth in this community.

Well. Representative Gordon had some other thoughts.  This one he posted in the comments on the blog:

“And this is why if I have anything to say about it, Tiverton will lose school funding to local charter schools. It doesn’t matter if gay or straight, if sexual meet-up groups are being promoted in our schools rather than improving test scores, that school is failing. Is it really more important for our children to get ‘sexed-up’, than learning advanced math?”

Since then he’s gone on local public radio to insist he’s not homophobic and defend himself. And it got worse, with him remarking that if students weren’t flaunting their sexuality, perhaps they wouldn’t be getting bullied.

I wonder if the words “ignorant gaybashing fuck” happened to get spraypainted onto Rep. Dan Gordon’s home, the perpetrator could use the excuse “Well.. if he wasn’t flaunting his homophobia, perhaps he wouldn’t have gotten singled out.”  (not likely. and I don’t plan to find out!)

But continue to flaunt, he does.  This dude is proud of picking on a group of students!!!

He has refused to apologize more than once, even though the local superintendent and other officials have stood by the group and condemned the comments.

And today, I visited the Patch site to see that he had sent in this gem:

Rep. Gordon:  School Officials Who Support GSA Add to Teen Delinquency

I mean… I don’t know what I’m more shocked about, that he’s still trying to talk his way out of this after everything he’s said or that anyone can still type with their head that far up their own ass.

So Mr. Gordon, if you can read this, here is your homework assignment for the Day of Silence and I will borrow a phrase that my darling partner likes to say -

Shut up and stop missing the point! 

If you want to tell this elected official your thoughts on his behavior, here is all his contact info:

email: rep-Gordon@rilin.state.ri.us

Providence Office:
State House
Room 323
Providence, RI 02903
Fax: (401) 222-6142

Portsmouth Office:
35 Alan Ave
Portsmouth, Rhode Island 02871
Phone: (401) 222-2259

If you are a student, teacher or youth-organizer taking part in an action tomorrow, I salute you and hope you have a very successful and empowering day tomorrow!

If you are not taking part in the Day of Silence, but you want to show your support for those who are, please speak out and spread the word that it’s happening.  I will be tweeting tomorrow about it with the hashtag #dayofsilence and tumblring stories about it all day.

Very happy to see the news that Congressman Jim Langevin has officially changed his position on Marriage Equality. Having supported Civil Unions in the past, he now recognizes that so-called “separate but equal” laws just don’t cut it. He is calling on Rhode Island’s General Assembly to pass the legislation that has recently been introduced. (I wrote about it here)

An excerpt from his op-ed piece:

… That difference struck me as fundamentally unjust, and I began to challenge the wisdom of creating separate categories of rights for certain groups of citizens. I began to see that civil unions fell short of the equality I believed that same-sex couples deserved.

As the debate about same-sex marriage continues in Rhode Island and in Washington, I have taken time to reflect carefully on my own position. Based on my own experiences and my firm belief that all Americans should be treated equally under the law, I am now convinced that affording full marriage equality rights to same-sex couples is the only fair and responsible approach for both Rhode Island and the nation. If our nation expects to provide equal protection to all, then our civic institutions must reflect that noble goal.

-  Jim Langevin, The Providence Journal, March 5, 2011

While this is great to read and I am excited and hopeful about the possibility of our little state making some progress in this arena, I am hoping that Congressman Langevin will take his new position seriously on a federal level as well and recognize how important it is that equal rights in marriage become recognized for all American citizens.  State level would be wonderful, but still not equal.  I look forward to seeing what Mr. Langevin says and does in Washington on this issue in the future.